Three Years Ago.......

Three years ago…….

Three years ago my life changed, I got married. I have been reflecting about what has taken place not only in my life but in my heart. Some of the lessons that I have learned have been life changing.

In the past three years I have learned……

Grace is something that I have to constantly choose to give

What giving grace really means

Unforgiveness can create a divide in any relationship and in the heart

It is very easy to want walk away

A commitment is a commitment

Love can be given unconditional from a human

I had a lot of full suitcases to still deal with when I got married

Amazed at what can be learned from parents

Being willing to hold someone’s hand through anything is hard

The enemy will try hard to rob you

Could not imagine doing this without the Lord

Prayer together

A lost an found can solve a lot of problems J

Pain can be real

Joy can be full

Prayer can answer a lot

Budgeting helps a ton

Paying off debt is AWESOME!

There are people I miss from my wedding pictures, because they were called home

Adoption is a journey that will change your life

Relationships can change drastically in an instant

There are things you wish you could take back

Laughter is good

Investing in marriage is essential

Allowing folks to walk along side of you is encouraging

Sharing your story is helpful

Little trips away are so much better than gifts

The cat did not like him at first

Having two bathrooms is essential

It is not all about you

You need to be ready for it, it is not for fun

God’s glory is worth fighting for

It is hard to believe that three years ago I walked down an isle with my dad, wore a white dress, ate blueberry French toast and danced till my heart was content all in celebration of the great covenant that God created.

Thank you Lord for your covenant, I could not imagine this journey without you.

In May 1943, German theologian Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote a letter to a young bride and groom, advising them on the nature of the union they were about to enter:

Your love is your own private possession, but marriage is more than something personal — it is a status, an office. Just as it is the crown, and not merely the will to rule, that makes the king, so it is marriage, and not merely your love for each other, that joins you together in the sight of God and man. As you gave the ring to one another and have now received it a second time from the hand of the pastor, so love comes from you, but marriage from above, from God. As high as God is above man, so high are the sanctity, the rights, and the promise of love. It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love.

While his counsel is powerful, the truly compelling part of this story begins when we consider where this letter was written, and who was doing the writing. This was no sunshine musing from a mere relationship counselor, but a wedding sermon offered from a prison cell, written by a hero waiting for the inevitable day of his painful execution.

This is a story about faithfulness, holiness, and sacrificial love.

Strong Father's

Father's Day has taken on new meaning for us. It was this day last year, that we signed the commitment papers for the adoption. 

This year Father's Day was a little different. We are eagerly anticipating the next steps in the adoption process. Our home study begins tomorrow which is so much more than signing papers on a dotted line. Meeting with a person face to face who is involved with our adoption. Michael got a card this year, (from his fur child of course) with a much needed grill brush and a book titled Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters. He has already begun to dive into it. Learning how the relationship with his daughter will greatly affect who she becomes.

We have also been reminiscing today as well about his strong dad. I only got the pleasure of knowing his dad for 16 short months. He was called Home shortly after I came into the picture. It was an honor to be involved in walking him home. Five days later, Michael and I got engaged. Michael has told me countless stories of the things he learned from his dad, their time together and just who his dad was.

And then there is my strong dad. I have learned so much from him. Not only some tangible items like how to fix things, creativeness, and doing for others. But he taught me how to be strong in spirit, to be dedicated to things and to love. Michael asked me today what was my most sentimental memory of my dad. I have thought about it all day, and it was my wedding day. Being able to dance with my dad at my wedding was a gift that could have never come in a package.

 

This does not even begin to mention all the “dad’s” that are in our lives’ that have enriched both Michael and I. God has used so many to teach us and continues to do so. We are both very thankful for them.

I have been thinking all day about what a dad Michael is going to be. God has been shaping him greatly, preparing him for this call. I have seen many great works even in our 3 short years of marriage and I am excited to see just how his world is going to be rocked when his little girl is home.

Happy Father’s Day to all the dad’s out there and all the dad’s to be. Please join us in praying for tomorrow, 6:30 when things kick into gear.

Jennifer

Rolling on the coaster......

If you have not already heard, we are busy, busy, busy getting ready for our first visit of our home study. It will begin on Monday the 18^th and will cover a total of four visits.  From my understanding, she will meet with us both initially, check out the house. And then meet with us personally along with one last visit.

I am very excited to meet our social worker in person. I have been conversing with her for 8 months or so now. Asking questions, gathering information. I am stoked to meet her in person. Please pray for her, she has a big job ahead of her. God entrusts her to make decisions for so many children and families.

Here is the shortened version of the next steps.  While our home study is going on, we will be working on documents for China. These will go along with our completed home study. Once we have a completed home study then we apply for immigration.  And finally our completed packet will be off to China for their approval and a referral.

What I did not expect to come up this week was the wide range of emotions that I have been experiencing. Panic set in when we actually had a date. Not because I did not trust God and the path that we are on, but the human side of me knows that we need to be approved to be parents. Which means someone needs to come and give us approval. The thoughts ran through my mind all weekend about what we needed to get done, what had to be cleaned, put together and so on.

Joy for the fact that things are kicking into high gear. This process is best described as a sandwich. We are laying down our first piece of bread.  The wait comes in the middle, once all of our documents are in the hands of the proper officials. And then the last piece of bread, to complete the sandwich, she will be home.  Weird I Know.

And the sadness. Weird to say I know, tears come in bucket fulls right now. In different times as well. A very good friend of mine recently had a baby.  We got to go see him. I was alone with him in the living room, holding him and just praying over him.  He was just a week old. This amazing creation with 10 fingers and 10 toes. Thoughts began to overwhelm me as to what is or was my daughters first week of life like. Did she have someone holding her and praying over her? Was someone telling her she was loved? These thoughts coupled with the fact that I was not there for that.

We came home and well, I guess you could say I had a momentary break down. Tonight we were cleaning out some things, and I found the baby blanket that my Grandma had made for us, and our first child. Along in that bag I also found a matching infants hat. I was reminded that it was not something we were going to get to use anytime soon.  I have totally been battling the enemy of inadequacy.

So as you can see, this is a process. A process not only on paper but, of the heart.  There are moments were the sheer excitement also turn into reality of the life that I have been called to.  A life that I accept with open arms. And just as God equips those who are called to motherhood through the natural way, he also equips those through the way of adoption. But that equipping takes some time.

Smelling like bleach and endust.........

Jennifer

And we are off

I guess you can say we are in full throttle of the paperwork race. Our home study packet is in the hand of Fed Ex to be delivered in the next day or so.

Some people ask, what is in a home study packet?

 

     Application

    Auto biography for each of this (Turned out to be 9 pages each)

     Cultural plan

    Transracial Parenting plan

    Pictures of our family (Yes that includes Elmo)

    Shot records for the cat

    Medical exam forms

    5 reference letters, some from co-workers, friends and family members

    A list of everywhere we have lived since we were 18

    The ok to do a background check

1   Copies of all insurance policies, drivers license, marriage certificate, and our birth certificates

    Our family budget

    A list of all of our Debts. Praise God this list is short! Thanks Dave Ramsey  

    911 records for the past 5 years

I know there are a few things I am missing. We still have to do our finger prints, get my medical form back, a septic tank inspection, and a list of all of our assets.

It has been quite the process to put all of this together. This list might seem a bit easy when you look at it, but putting it all together, getting things notarized and making sure everything was correct was a task.

Now we are in deep clean mode. The next step is for everything to be evaluated and then we have a social worker come and make four visits to our house. Please be in prayer for this process. It is daunting to know that someone will be coming into your house to determine if you are fit to be parents.

During this time, we will also begin the work for what has to go to China. More to come on that.

Thanks for walking this journey………..

Jennifer