Monday, June 5, 2017

My Heart Found a home... And it had to move

It has been a while since our last post. The rug got pulled out from under us in December when we accepted a job offer in Texas, and then two weeks later, Michael landed in the hospital. From there, we spent the next 8 days praying for the future encompassing his survival.  

Three weeks later he left for Texas. My Uncle made a space available in his house for him to stay, and I was left in GA with H along with getting our house ready to sell. I was numb to the idea of moving. After all, I had this little gal to take care of along with finish all the projects in our house that needed to be done prior to that sign going on the market. It consumed me, and I had to disappear from life for a season. Michael came home on his days off, which were crazy hours but we found a new normal.

We tried to keep things as normal as possible, we celebrated our 3rd family day with our sweet gift from Jesus. It has been an honor to watch her grow and change. It has also been an honor to answer the questions she is asking about where she came from. We have been charged with a great gift.

In early April the house went on the market, within 24 hours we had 22 showings and four offers. Closing was set for May 22nd.  It was a confirmation that we were on the right path.

Through that next month, the house was packed up, our stuff was sold (we purged a ton) and tried to explain to our girl what was going on. Hosanna had a ton of “final” acts. She graduated pre-school, had a dance recital.

It was during that last crazy weeks, as our lasts in GA happened, that I realized just how deep my heart found a home.

It was the first time in a very long time that I could say that. I had developed incredibly deep relationships in GA. I moved there fresh from China. I got married in GA, grieved the loss of my grandma, I spent 30 months with countless people cheering us to and brought home my baby, found a job and I deeply love, walked through the muck and mire with my husband. Only to come out better on the other side. Found some incredible mentors that allowed me a free space to be. My heart had found a home in all this, and I did not want to leave the comfort of that.

Now I sit in an 853 sq foot apartment. I have my girl and my guy. We have my uncle around the corner and two other people not to far from here that we know. It’s us, them and Jesus.

As people told me just how much they love me and my family. Their texts, cards, their hugs, tears, the well wishes, celebrations, prayers, I knew that I had found a place where I could be me. Despite my flaws, I was loved beyond measure by folks on this earth. That forgiveness existed, and people were willing to give it.

Two days on the road, 1 hotel room, a van filled with the dog, cat, and a dear friend who came for the drive, we made it to Texas. And now I sit here, longing for the place where my heart found a home. Longing to make connections with people and sit in a place of comfort. I long not to be searching for my new church home, for a area that I know how to get to. I long for coffee with my friends, our subdivision pool, my daughter to have play dates at Burger king. In fact, Hosanna even ask when we were going back to GA.

Moving is not easy. I know that we are where we are supposed to be. For now, we get to know our new normal is this little apartment that we have been given. A house will be coming, its already in the works. Hopefully that will help the need to connect with the locals.


Pit stop along the way

My Heart Found a home. 

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