Side bar....5 years

Five years ago today I said I do. To a man that I had known for 11 years before that. We walked down the aisle, both old enough to be called adults, and yet, both of us not really knowing what adulthood meant until we stepped over threshold of I do. And thus I began one of the most sanctifying processes of my life.

Marriage changed my life, and for those who think it does not, makes me really sad. Marriage is father beyond a commitment, it is a covenant to a life long partner. A covenant that is not suppose to be broken, no matter the circumstance. This covenant is one that requires, at times, a fierce fight to keep it in tact. It is one that can bring great joy, one that can bring a spouse to experience sorrow with and one that requires you have others to walk along side you to keep it in tact.

I went into my marriage thinking my husband would complete me, according to the world, love stories, even Disney movies, that is what he, my knight in shining armor is suppose to do, complete me, meet my every need. Man, was I a broken vessel in need of repair. We both were, and early into our marriage and it showed it’s ugly head very quickly. Thankfully we have both had the faith to walk the road out. Certainly, there were many times that the stress of life could have caused us to go off the deep end. In the 5 years we have been married, a degree has been obtained, 4 surgeries, a broken leg leaving one spouse down for 14 weeks. We have spent three years becoming parents, weather the storm of some family relationships changing for the worse, dealt with parents and grandparents illnesses, watching relationships with friends slip away. We have traveled to the other side of the world, we have become parents to a little girl we do not deserve, we have become debt free and managed to stay that way.  In all of that God was faithful. In all of that God was good. God provided everything that we needed not only in the way of monetary provision, but in a “family” of support. We have learned through this sanctification process what it meant to have safe people in your life, but most importantly, we have learned the value of doing life with those that really want to do life with you.

I talk often with friends who are single in there 20’s, Many following the call of God across the world, and there is a common theme of wanting a husband. As I reflect on the past five years, I could not imagine experiencing all this in my 20’s and surviving it. I was so immature as I look back, I am thankful that I was indeed called to wait. Thankful that God knew the perfect timing, and exactly what I might be able to handle.

So, while things are always not hearts and rainbows, we are better because of the road that we walked. We are not only better for us, but better for our children.

I am so incredibly thankful to all that have walked in the trenches of life with us. Thank you for accepting the challenge from God to walk life out with us both in the great times and not so great times. Because of you all, we are celebrating 5.

And to my husband, thank you for not wilting away. Thank you being your commitment to your faith, which is then brought out into our home. I may not always see it, but it is there. Because of your commitment WE are still a WE. I love you much, and based on how we are dreaming lately, looking forward to see the next mountains that God is going to move in our lives. Here is to the next 5, 10, 15, 20 or how ever many years God will have us be on this earth together.

Jennifer

“Marriage is more than your love for each other. It has a higher dignity and power, for it is God's holy ordinance, through which He wills to perpetuate the human race till the end of time. In your love you see only your two selves in the world, but in marriage you are a link in the chain of the generations, which God causes to come and to pass away to His glory, and calls into His kingdom. In your love, you see only the heaven of your own happiness, but in marriage you are placed at a post of responsibility towards the world and mankind. Your love is your own private possession, but marriage is more than something personal - it is a status, an office. Just as it is the crown, and not merely the will to rule, that makes the king, so it is marriage, and not merely your love for each other, that joins you together in the sight of God and man. It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love.” Detrich Bonhoeffer