Our Journey East (A little farther east): The Eve we have been waiting for

We hung this on our tree last Christmas as we waited. .

I am sitting here in the late hrs of Christmas eve marveling at the fact that our tree looks so different this year. Last year, I remember sitting with Michael at Christmas and just crying because our Santa paper went unused for yet another year, and our girl whom we had a face for, was sitting in her crib in the orphanage, and we had an ornament to hang on the tree. It just all did not seem right.

I had dreams about the first Christmas with her. Dreams of the cookie making, gingerbread house decorating, putting up the Christmas tree, decorating the house (Inside and out), making memories. And as I sit this Christmas eve and marvel about the fact that she is here, I am so excited for tomorrow morning, and the day that we will have together. I have also been battling just what the perfect 1^st Christmas should look like. There are things that I wanted to so badly get accomplished, that did not happen. Yes we put up a tree, (But in the process Michael had a kidney stone attack, and well the star just went on tonight). We did decorate the house, but it was kept at a minimum because it just would have been to overwhelming for our girl. We have had to battle family telling us that Christmas should be on Christmas instead of the spacing out that we have been doing because of just how overwhelming it will all be. There were no gingerbread houses because we just ran out of time, barley baked a few break and bake cookies because who can sit there at three and decorate??

And as I sit, I comes to terms with it is all ok, because while making memories is important, focusing on the fluff is not. It is not because there was no fluff for Jesus. There were no cookies, gingerbread house or tree. The gifts he got on his birthday were small yet very very thoughtful. There was no pomp and circumstance. There he was born in a barn and lay in a manger with hay. We lay our heads on a soft pillow at night, and the one who will ushers me into eternity lay in a barn. The one who died for my sins, long long before I was born, had cattle around his bedside. The one who has written the story of our girl becoming a Bowden, was ridiculed, scoffed at had a meager and humble beginning. And that is what we want our girl to know and come to love, with lots of fun mixed in.

We do have some traditions that we are beginning with her. Chinese food on Christmas eve, only Santa coming on Christmas day, a Happy Birthday to Jesus cinnamon roll (Because cinnamon rolls are what we use on birthday mornings). There will only be 4 gifts under the tree, want, need, read, and wear. We will read over and over again the birth of Christ leading up to Christmas. We will give in someway shape or form. This year it was picking out some toys for toys for tots. But most of all, and one that she can already articulate, that Jesus is in the heart, and HE will be all she needs.

Merry Merry Christmas to you. May your day be filled with love, joy, peace, and most of all, thankfulness for the lowly beginning of our Savior.

Now I must get to bed, Although I am to excited to sleep!!!!