Selling our hearts out

Part of the waiting process, at least from what I am seeing is so we can see God do incredible things. This past weekend we had our second yard sale to go towards our adoption. Our garage was full of items as Michael put it “People let us adopt their stuff so we could adopt our kid”. Friends and family came to help us sell. And sell we did. About $1000 worth of stuff we sold. People’s cars were lined down the street, stories were told, neighbors were met, but most important, Her story was told that God is writing for our house.

We were also humbled and left speechless by a friend this week. I have known her since I moved to GA. She dropped off some stuff for our yard sale and dropped off an envelope which left us speechless. So with all of this as well as the savings that we have done, we are about $500 away from our last goal. Amazing.

Amazing to think that we started out with a mountain that is about $28,000 to climb. Amazing to think that we are within a single digit reach of that. Once we reach our next goal, we round it out with our travel expenses.

People have told me that adoption is too expensive and we must be rich. For two years we have not been shopping for things that were not needed. New clothes have not been bought, dinners out have not been eaten, wild vacations have not been taken. We drive old paid off cars, do not own the latest gadgets, we do not have cable or Netflix all in an effort to honor what we have been told to do.  We have scrimped, saved, yard saled it, selling t-shirts as we speak and prayed. We are rich, not monetarily but in spirit and faith. Nobody will ever be able to convince of anything other than who my provider is.

Thank you to each one of you who has donated their stuff, time, effort, prayers, energy, given of themselves. It is all working to get her home. Please be praying as we enter the final leg of the fund raising part. Along with be praying for our referral. The wait is hard, emotional, draining and yet peaceful.

Jennifer

Mothers Day, from a momma in waiting

As Mother’s Day approach, I could feel my heart tugging in a sad direction. I thought for sure this was a Mother’s Day where I would know who our child is. I would have a picture, we would have a finality insight for our adoption. But alas, the timeline that I had hoped for, is not happening. Instead and thankfully, the perfect timeline is in motion. But then I look at my life and find myself incredibly thankful for all the different types of people that I have in my life whom Mother’s day affects.

Dear Birth Mothers-

What an incredible gift you have given to so many people. It might not have been the route that you were going to choose for yourself, but because of your selfless act, (no matter the reason) so many are completing their family. And although I do not know who my daughter’s birth mother is, or the birth mother of my niece I am incredibly thankful for both. You are completing our families. Because of your desire to not do something to your child other than to give birth, you are allowing us to be parents and allowed my sisters family to be complete. I hope and pray you can feel the thankfulness that we have for you on Mother’s Day.

Dear Momma’s in waiting-

Happy Mother’s Day! If you are a momma in waiting through adoption, this is probably something that you did not think you would hear. But from personal experience, I know that your heart is already being knit (just as mine is) with your child, even if you do not know that child yet. I know first hand the longing that you feel, and how hard this day can be. I pray that you can see light at the end of the tunnel and the joy that will abound from the hard work.

Happy Mother’s Day to all my friends (and there are many of you) that are expecting or have given birth this year-

 If I were to count the numbers on my fingers and toes, I would need more hands and feet than I have. I am incredibly excited for each one of you. What a gift and a joy you have been given. I pray that you cherish it.

To my Friends who long to be a mom-

This is a hard place to be in, because just like me, the time is not here yet. I can’t give you any answers as to why, but know in my heart that it is all part of a greater plan. God places desires on our hearts for a reason and uses the time in between for molding and shaping, to prepare us. I pray that you can find a reason to celebrate.

Dear Friends who do not have a momma to celebrate with in the flesh-

This is an especially hard holiday. I know that I have had people, I would love to be able to celebrate with that have gone on from this year. But I pray that you are able to find ways to celebrate those that you would have celebrated with in the flesh. This is not a day for mourning but a day to rejoice in the gift that you were given in a mom even if it were for a short time. Please do not say that you hate this day, Rejoice in the fact that you have someone you would want to celebrate.

To all my mom’s out there-

Thank you for allowing me to be special in your life. As I reflect on just how many of you I have in my life I am so thankful for each one of you. I think of just how lucky I am to have so many that are willing to go above and beyond and let me in your families. You might have not given birth to me, but you love me like I was one of your own. Happy Mother’s Day to you.

And to my mom-

Happy Mother’s Day. Thanks for choosing the gift of life and giving birth to me. I look forward to celebrating with you when you come in a couple of weeks.

If you are a mom, have a mom, had a mom, are a mom in waiting, are a mom to a furry friend and fit any mom category, Happy Mother’s Day! I hope that you have a time of celebrating

And to my little girl-
I can't wait to have you home. As the days drag on, my heart longs and aches for you to be here. We are praying for you as your Aunties take care of you and prepare you for us. You have a rather large group of folks just waiting to hug you. 

Love, Jennifer

May......Marks October

Happy May Day. In China this is a big holiday, big enough to give everyone the day off. For me, it marks another month of waiting, and another month off the calendar that we will not be leaving to get our daughter.

The wait is incredibly hard. And for someone who was never good at waiting, it is harder. I know that this is a time of stretching, walking in faith, but man it is rough. Imagine being pregnant (for almost two years) with no due date insight. For those of my friends that have experienced pregnancy, no due date would produce a wrath J that would more than likely bring down a country. 

I have people breathing down my neck wanting to know our plans for the fall. I have had people tell me in recent weeks that I am ruining their vacation plans because we do not know when we are going. To them, I say sorry and deal. I know it might sound a bit harsh, but that is the reality. Think about what you are saying before you say it. At times part of me just want to scream “Do you not know what it is like to wait?? Wait for someone to tell you when you will be a parent??”. The only thing I can do is pray, pray for the selfishness to disappear and for them to get a grip. Even just this week, I had someone tell me it would be easier if you were pregnant, then a timeline would be definitive. Don’t you think I know that?

I think one of the harder parts in waiting is watching others, who began the process after us get their referral before us and even a travel time line. Circumstances in adoption are so individual and so you cannot compare, but it is so hard not to.

But there are some positives to waiting…… We are able to pray and reach out to others. I sent Mary (The lady at the adoption agency that we are working with) an email just to let her know that we were praying for her. She replied “That is the nicest thing I have heard in a while”. She has a huge job, needing the eyes to see who fits into what family.

We are able to save even more. Right now we are working on the orphanage fee and our travel expenses and then our adoption will be fully funded. Crazy to think when we began this journey there was a huge mountain. The mountain is ever so easier to climb.

I have some time to do things I probably would not be doing if we had children. Like jet setting to meet some friends in the FL Keys for a fun filled weekend. The beach…. The one place where my batteries get recharged and beauty just hits.

I guess you can call these, thoughts for the morning. I am incredibly grateful for the folks that are willing to walk along side. The emails, phone calls, texts of just saying we are praying. It is amazing to think that we have people on several continents praying for our daughter. Praying for her reveal, praying for her to come home and praying for her parents as they prepare. The body is humbling, people willing to stand in the gap.

Longing and resting on hope,

Jennifer