Where is your treasure

It has been a little over a month since we have been home. It is amazing to think just 6 weeks ago, I was in China getting my girl. Lots of firsts have happened in this month. She has met a ton of new friends, we have had meals delivered that have allowed us to only cook twice. Many dance parties have happened, kisses been given, hugs, visits to church, Easter egg hunt, prayers been sent by her, songs sung, so much life has been lived in the past 30 days.

For this Mama, lots of lessons being taught. There is nothing like the innocence of a child that reminds an adult what they are missing out of in life that steals joy. For this Mama there is nothing more sweeter then praising Jesus with my gal in church and watching her desire to talk to Him increase.  Oh and we cannot forget the dancing in the aisles, who says you cannot dance in a Baptist church.

For me, the experience of being a mom has really put into perspective where to lay my value. But it has also allowed me to see my own selfishness in my heart. I AM an incredibly selfish being. And I do not think, until you devote your hours to a person that needs the devotion, does that realization happen. You do not realize how you enjoy certain things, miss time with people, enjoy the peace in your home, or alone time until a child breaks that all up. So instead of taking a leisurely bath in the evening, you are rocking your little one through a nightmare. Instead of sitting they’re enjoying a hot plate of goodness at dinner, you eat in small bites with your eye on someone else to make sure they do not choke. And, frankly it really does not matter if you get a hot meal. I walk into my closet now, and think, why do I need all of this. Will anyone really care if I wear the same clothes every week. What is in here, could help start the fund to get her a sibling or take care of some other need. The question I find myself asking the most is it necessary.  

Matthew 6:21 has continually played in my head “where your treasure is, your heart will be also.” I hear the same question over and over in my head, is this worth my time, is it treasure worthy. Since Michael and I have gotten married, finances have been one of those things that we have been on the same page on. And honoring God with those finances has been the most important. So, our first year of marriage we spent paying off any debt. Then we spent the next 18 months building up the emergency fund to a 3-6 month supply. Once that was all done, we had this task called adoption. And during that time, we bought a home, paid cash for any improvements in the home, paid cash for some crazy medical expenses, we were able to give and so on. Our focus was on a treasure that would not waste away on this earth.

The selfish/flesh of me once we had gotten home, really just wanted to relax from this. I really did not want to focus on the net big thing, I wanted a season where we were not putting everything we had away into something. But that is not the case and nor it should be. The fact of the matter is, we should NEVER stop evaluating where our treasure is to be placed. We should never stop thinking about where the value of what we do today, will be placed in eternity.

So if you were to come to my house right now, my value is not necessarily in making sure this place is spotless. It is in spending time with my little girl. Playing will only last for so long, I am seizing the time to bond while I can. We take the extra time to model when appropriate as opposed to an instant dismissal. We value time with her just being silly, as opposed to always being an adult. It is time to be a little silly up in this house, as that will go farther then any adult thing that I can do for eternity and the heart of my girl.

More to come,

Jennifer